Permission is a Narrative

Visiting my aunt and sharing English breakfast tea while munching scones, I told her that I had decided to take up photography. For a living. Why not do this in the afternoon was her immediate response. Afternoons were for the fun stuff, mornings for serious work.

This was over 15 years ago. It really got to me. I have been hearing this kind of advice my whole life. Others actively pushing against my intuition. And I have come to realise that aunts come in all shapes and sizes. Adults telling me what was right. Nudging me when I was wrong. This has mostly stopped now that I have kids of my own. 

But the voice in my head, has been continuing to upkeep this rational judgement giving. Her loudest claim is: you are nobody, who are you to do this? 

I don’t agree with her most of the time, but she is there lurking around, questioning and doubting me. She is my 3am morning voice, when I can’t go back to sleep. And the one that whispers advice here and there when I am talking myself up to doing something I felt really excited about. The idea for the radical hope club for example. It’s about two years old. My best friend and me were really excited about it, sharing hours full of ideas. Then it died down. It popped up again every now and then, but the timing didn’t feel quite right. And this hole was eating us up, this feeling that we were alone in caring. Why should we push against this? It felt as if the world didn’t need us cheering on from the sidewalk. 

But then this December, I decided that I had had enough. That I was going to log on to beehiiv and start this. And then figure out what I’m trying to build on the way. 

If you're reading this, you're what Mary Elaine Jacobsen calls creatively intelligent. I’m not guessing, it’s a pattern I see. If you need convincing, test it yourself: Can you easily reframe problems? Do you resist idea killers? Can you generate wild ideas and make them work? According to Jacobsen’s research, these traits are the main drivers of innovation. But here's the trap: The same intelligence that lets you see possibilities also lets you see every reason not to act. You can argue yourself out of anything. The voice in your head isn't stupid, but sophisticated. That's why it's so hard to ignore.

Here's what I know: The permission structure is outdated. Not breaking down, already broken. The adults who told us to sit tight? They were operating inside a system that no longer exists. The voice in your head is protecting you from consequences that aren't real anymore. My aunt was right that I needed income. She was wrong that it had to come from a 'serious' job. The real trap wasn't her advice, it was believing I needed her permission to ignore it.

Every single person I respect has stopped to figure this out. It’s a mindshift move, hard and worth it. You feel the pull toward something. Act on it. Not because you'll succeed immediately, but because waiting for permission is waiting for something that will never come.

When you act, you'll discover you're not alone. Not 'maybe‘, definitely. 69% of people want this. They're just waiting for someone else to go first.

You don't need permission. You need to start. And then something real begins.

There are others like us, let’s find them. 

Written by a human. Unpolished. On purpose.